Spotty Herbert and man with the Luminous Thingy

When the terrible explosion destroyed the custard factory, the criminal gang were believed to have been vaporised. What nobody realised at the time was that one of them, a Colombian drug dealer called Carlos Fandango had gone to the little boy’s room to siphon the python, you know shake the snake, as they say in Bogota. His wedding tackle had been caught in a direct blast of concentrated cabbage juice, which had turned it a bright luminous green colour. Although he washed and scrubbed it several times the offending weapon still glowed in the dark, through his trousers, causing him some embarrassment.

He was already attracting the attention of the old ladies and several rare species of moths as well, but there was something odd about this man, apart from his luminous wedding tackle. You see the fumes from the concentrated cabbage water had affected his brain, leaving him with the amazing ability to know what pigs were thinking




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